“Happy” Hallothanksmas

Have you ever had one of those weird sleeps where you feel like your head touches the pillow and then
it’s immediately time to get up?
It starts innocently enough…hat day, glow day, school spirit day, and then BOOM it happens. Fall Festival
season. Consistent as gravity, death, and taxes, the Annual (insert whatever school my kids go to) Fall
Carnival is basically the unofficial start of Hallothanksmas. If you’re not familiar with Hallothanksmas, it’s
the parental clusterfreakery that occurs from somewhere in October to somewhere around St. Patrick’s
Day. The amount of required purchases, participations, and activities creates a time vortex that creates
the sensation I described above, except I wake up with a considerably lighter bank account and a desire
to take a hot bath until it all starts again next year.
Don’t get me wrong, I love the holiday season! The memories that we make every year are priceless.
These, however, are the parts I equally love and hate:

  1. Candy, candy, candy. Despite my best efforts, every year I come away from the holiday season
    with two kids still coming down from a sugar high that’s essentially lasted for 4-5 months. It ain’t
    pretty. Sugar is definitely a drug.
  2. Money, money, money. The holidays are way more expensive than the rest of the year based on
    a combination of the things we have to buy, the workdays we miss because the kids aren’t in
    school, and the cost of childcare for those who absolutely can’t afford to miss those workdays.
  3. Parties, parties, parties. Y’all party way too hard during Hallothanksmas. And heads up, I’m not
    participating in gift exchanges if I can get away with it. I love parties but I hate being obligated to
    party. Parties are supposed to be fun, but most gatherings are just downright awkward. My
    armpits are sweating just thinking about it.
  4. Family, family, family. My family is very ahem extended. I don’t even know literally half of
    these people and they all have very large (dare I say, redneck? Yes I do.) personalities. It’s
    exhausting. No kidding, I make it a priority to check in with my therapist as a Hallothanksmas gift
    to myself every year.
    Nevertheless, we persist, and somehow we still manage to get excited about it! Celebrate the start
    of the season with me at Boo at the Zoo at Santa Fe College on October 31, 2019! A canned good is
    all that is required for entry. We also have some very special surprises for those who stop by and
    learn more about Palmetto & Pine!
    Merry Hallothanksmas and Happy New Year!

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